Saturday, June 6, 2015


Well I officially hit 60lbs lost!!! I have struggled with the scale the last few weeks everyone tells me the scale becomes your worst friend during this process well I agree. I don't understand when you are eating so little how you gain weight, but it happens whether it is muscle weight gain or still eating some not healthy things (because let's face it you are still you and you got heavy because you like food). I have decided through this process I am a sugaraholic " not alcoholic" but just as bad because to much of anything is not good for you!  As I type this morning eating my egg whites and turkey bacon I also find I like the good foods as well, but see they take time and energy to make and that is my problem I want fast and easy (convenient foods). So to help with my convenient foods need, I have created a mommy snack drawer with edamame snacks, almonds, low fat peanut butter (which is a new addiction) protein bars and 90 calorie snack bars this does help. My other thing I have found this week I love is sugar free jello with skim milk and sugar free cool whip (sweet treat low fat).

I know I have said this before but the struggle is real and this is not easy. I get mad at myself when I make poor choices but I am still human and this is the rest of my life!!! I still see myself 60lbs heavier when I look for clothes I don't realize what size I actually wear. Thanks to a couple great friends I have a new wardrobe to get me through to my next victories. Thanks for all your encouragement and reading my post! My journey is still evolving as I learn, grow and struggle!

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Seeing results

ok so after my woe is me post from yesterday I have to brag a little bit. I have a doctors appointment tomorrow with the weight doctor and next Wednesday with my primary care doctor, I had blood work ordered so I decided I would kill two birds with one stone and had it done this morning so both doctors could review it.

I am so excited to report that the morning of surgery my a1c was 8.5 (this is your blood sugar over a period of time) I was on two diabetic medicines, today I would like to report my a1c is 5.3 normal not any where near diabetic levels. A pre-diabetic is 6.0 to give you a guide. I am off all my meds still, can't wait to see the doctor to go over my blood work. This is the main reason, I had this surgery to help with my diabetes!!!! A long way to go but I can do this!!! I had a rough day today but I am ending it on a great note!!!!

Monday, May 4, 2015

3 month struggles

Ok so this past week has been tough for me... I have gained weight ugh.. How I am not sure because I have been going to ypthe gym walking, and even keeping to my calories but looking back I see a pattern starting.. Old habits come back real quick.. So I have been looking up recipes for low carb recipes, because I am going to do this! I have been feeling better than I have in a long time.

The plan for me to get back in the groove of loosing I am going to be making up my food ahead of time like I did at the beginning of my journey. I love the blog I have been getting some wonderful recipes to try. For those who think weight loss surgery is easy you are so wrong!!! The head battle is real, I know I have said it before but this is tough!!! Family gatherings are tough because I want to eat like I did at my heaviest but in reality I really do not. I am going start keeping a cooler of goodies with me as the summer months are quickly approaching this way when I get really hungry I have something ready.mi am finding the 30-30-30 rule very difficult sometimes. ( stop drinking 30 minutes before you eat, eat for 30 minutes and don't drink for 30 minutes after you eat) I find sometimes I am starving by the time it is time to eat sometimes I am eating to quickly and over eating. I have to be mindful of what I am putting in my mouth. Another struggle I am finding is late night or right before bed hunger. I am getting in my protein I think it is more the mental struggle.

So it is back to the basics I have an appointment Wednesday with my doctor so I am going to discuss my recent struggles. And an update I have made it to the gym 2 days last week and walked 2 times so this is getting easier still not comfortable with the gym...

Sunday, April 26, 2015


I have been wanting to post for awhile but seems life is so busy lately. so how have things been going? Things have been going pretty good. I have been walking 2-3 days a week with a wonderful group of ladies. I had my first visit at the gym with the personal trainer on Friday that went well, but the anxiety about going to the gym was almost enough to make me not leave the house.  Walking into a gym to me is like walking into a new school and being the new student where everyone is watching you!  I know a lot of people who struggle with weight struggle with this.  I didn't I went in I did a work out even walked on the treadmill, still not sure about the gym. I am much better when I have someone to do it with. I am officially down 56 pounds.....

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

My Journey

Well for those who have been wondering how things or wondered if I was still blogging yes I have been meaning to blog what has been going on... Well today marks 8 weeks post op wow 8 weeks it seems like yesterday my journey began! I purchased my first new clothing item since surgery and I am proud to say it is a size smaller! My current pant situation is going to be interesting if I don't decide to go and get a few things... I am down a total of 48 pounds which is wonderful, I did hit a two week stall but the scale is moving again.

I am surprised how quickly calories add up when you are watching what you put in your mouth! I can see why so many of us struggle with our weight, so much of our foods are high in fat and calories. 16 jelly beans is 130 calories, a meal at your favorite restaurant probably is over 1000 calories half of your daily allotment or in my case all my calories for a day. Before surgery I really never paid attention to this so I am shocked.

At this point my day looks something like this:

5 am 3 egg whites with 1/4 cup of reduced fat cheese for about 165 calories and 20g of protein
Then I usually get about 16-32 oz of water in before 7:30 (because no eating and drinking and you have to wait 30 minutes after a meal to drink it is called the 30-30-30 rule)
Around 8 am I will have a snack which can be either a kind bar or yogurt which is around 200 calories.
Then I drink another 16 ounces of water
At 11 it is lunch time and for lunch I usually eat tuna and some green beans which is around 150 calories and 16 grams of protein.
More water... Lots of water
Time for another snack around 2 I usually will have some turkey jerky which is 12 grams of protein and 70 calories or a sugar free pudding which is 60 calories.
Then more water
And around 5 pm dinner time and that will vary but tonight it was a turkey soft taco which was really good (I found tortilla shells for 50 calories and 2.5 net carbs! Which were pretty good!)
And then it is bedtime my days vary but normally I get anywhere from 900-1100 calories and 60-96 grams of protein!

Monday, March 16, 2015


 I am finding that the amount of food I put into my mouth is a struggle sometimes. Mentally I want to eat what I want and not worry about it. I still have to talk to myself in my head that is that really worth the putting on a pound for. I know I am going to battle with my head for the rest of my life but I didn't realize how much it would be at first.

As I sit here eating my frozen tilapia with 13 g. of protein and only 80 calories, I want to add french fries and some sort of veggie (now remember this is my head talking). I am finding out you can't change 40 years of bad eating habits in 5 weeks. People think weight loss surgery is an easy fix boy are they wrong, this is definitely just a help to get me started on my journey but I have to continually make the right decisions for my body.

I have not had a diet coke in 7 weeks and you know I thought I would miss it but honestly I really don't (victory number 1). Diet coke for me before surgery was my go to drink and I mean I drank it and nothing else 6-8 a day so to give it up totally and not want it is a victory. My other weakness before surgery is candy any kind of candy peanut butter and chocolate was my favorite but I would eat any.  So with Easter coming this will be a challenge for me but I can do it. I will  not eat a Easter basket full of chocolate.  The struggle with food is definitely a real struggle that so many people think you can just turn off that is so NOT THE CASE.  If you are a person who has never struggled with weight please do not judge others who do, because you do not understand. Just like I do not understand what it is like to be a drug addict or an alcoholic. We need to be understanding to those with addiction problems and not judge them or tell them how to FIX IT. I know eating less and exercise helps lose weight but before surgery I couldn't get it done. 

For my job I work in the public and because the facility is old it is not set up for Obese patients and  for a patient to not be able to fit through a door or fit in a chair (or have to ask for a different chair because they won't fit in one with arms) is as embarrassing for the person asking as it is for the person who has to help. Please when you see someone who doesn't fit the "normal" standard don't judge do not make rude comments have compassion and understanding that they may have gotten themselves in this situation but it wasn't because they wanted to get fat or become a drunk or a druggie, or for some they may be born with a handicap, but whatever the situation and whatever the reason they need compassion.  Now I don't think we need to encourage the behavior but we need to listen and if we can't help find someone who can, but sometimes we just need to talk. Sorry this post is rambling a bit, but I am coming to a better understanding of what an addiction is. I have an addiction to food that I need to change. 

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

4 week post op

Can you believe it has already been 4 weeks since I had my surgery, I can't it seems like just yesterday I went to my first weight loss seminar (that was a year ago in January).  

So far things have been going very well for me, I have not had any problems with eating or drinking (which is a blessing because some do struggle after the sleeve surgery). This past Friday I was running a bit late and rushing and thought I just over did it but my sugars and blood pressure were fine still didn't feel right Monday morning so went to see my surgeon. He thinks I might have just been over doing it  since I was back at work and possibly just going through withdrawal from my blood pressure medicine. I like to report that it is doing awesome, blood sugars seem to still be down. Fingers crossed I can stay off the medicines as my diet progresses. 

After the snow and cold weather we have had since my surgery I have not been able to exercise (cleaning house doesn't count or so I am told) tonight I went for my first walk it felt great to be outside (I can tell that I just had surgery) I made it for 15 minutes tonight I will take it (I am tired after my walk) hopefully I can get more in this week before it rains again. 

I am officially down a total of 40 lbs...!!!! YEAH (insert celebration here).